Monthly Archives: March 2011

Slippery slopes

Enforced relaxation I find to be anything but relaxing…. especially when one is supposed to be on a skiing holiday! Lazing around doing nothing is not in my character, but I’ve been taking things very easy, as per doctor’s orders.

Fortunately Angus has found some friends to ski (and drink) with. At least I finish the antibiotics today, so a glass of wine with dinner at the Museum tonight will go down a treat.

The snow here in St Anton is disappearing fast, there is still some good skiing up on the higher slopes, and there is one very gentle blue and red ski-route up at Rendl that I’ve been able to get a few runs down.

Most of the time I spend by the pool or in the sauna, but I do feel a bit like Billy-no-mates.

Of course the best bit is not having to worry about work for a whole week.

Stoned – literally!!

There was I – happy as Larry on the farm. I got up Sunday morning raring to get on with the airconditioning on ROJ – I’m still rebuilding the condensor box with bits of old Walls icecream cartons, and trying to work out how the network of tiny airtubes go that control the air-flaps in the system.

An hour or so into the day I was not feeling well, stomach cramps and giddiness, by lunchtime I felt like death, so decided to come back to London.

On the train I thought I would pass out with the pain in my side, so once at St Pancras I headed straight to A&E at UCH. There they gave me something that looked like a thunderbird rocket and was told to shove it where the sun don’t shine…. The most effective pain killer I’ve had for years. I was floating above the consultant’s couch.

Railway stations, cross country buses, and hospital A&E departments. If you’re writing a book about weird and wonderful people – those are the places to frequent – and there is nothing private or discreet about a big city hospital A&E late on a weekend evening – especially one near Kings Cross!

I sat for three drug hazed hours watching an entire cross section of society go past, until the results of my tests came back. Kindney stones – not just one, but a whole gravel pit full.

They took me for a scan – one of those big doughnut shaped machines, which rather absurdly had a brand name – it was grandly called a ‘Monatom Sensation 64′. What overpaid marketing dick-head came up with that…?

Anyway, upshot is, I’ve got a stone the size of Mars blocking off the right kidney and two smaller ones inside each. They can zap the smaller ones with ultrasound but the Big One….

Now chaps, be brave. Reading this is not going to be comfotable – and when my chum Andrew breezily suggested I kept my pecker up… well, he’d got it almost in one.

The trusty surgeon will be taking an endoscopic laser and -

Let me just assure you, I WILL be unconcious at this stage, if not from the anaesthetic then from the mere sight of a fully grown man in a gown advancing on my nether regions with a long bendy ray gun…

They will then blast Mars to incy-wincy pieces with the laser and scrape out the debris.

This is all very jolly. In the space of a month I will have had both top and bottom end blasted by lasers – isn’t modern technology wonderful.

I think skiing next week will be a very gentle affair – no black runs for me.

Carpetted – literally!

It’s been a truely exhausting few weeks. Work has been unrelentingly miserable, my eye is killing me following the latest lazer surgury, and sorting out my mother’s house is a mammoth task – but who cares, I’ve got an Aston Martin to build!

Being on the farm is always therapeutic, and today was a beautiful sunny day. I spent most of it in the barn sorting out stuff.

We’ve brought Stephanie’s little VDP 1300 up on a trailer – it’s been in my mother’s garage for the past five years, at least now all my car related stuff is in one place.

I’ve got three different sets of AM carpets and laid them all out on the barn floor – some are pretty shot and some I may be able to reuse. I just haven’t a clue where they are all going to go!

After this, one more week at work and then it’s off to St Anton with Angus for our annual skiing trip – yippee.